French Milled Soap, Meet...TSA

Have you ever noticed the soap that seems to be very popular in hotels? The packages usually have the phrase, "French Milled." Does anybody have a clue as to why that is so important to print on the wrapping of a bar of soap that is so small it can slide out of your hand at least once per shower? This dynamic product that hotels use to "Wow" their guest while they shower also seems to be notorious for acting as a low grade sand paper on my facial skin. Even more puzzling to the "French Milled" phenomenon would be it's effect on blemishes. Blemishes, also known as Zits for those of use who don't need to use fancy words to describe puss bubbles on our faces, seem to defy the drying effects of the "French Milled" soaps. I've noticed that even though these fine crafted soaps can dry out a face faster than a Kuwaiti Sandstorm in the middle of Summer, they still can't seem to help dry out a zit. As a matter of fact, they dry the skin on top of the zit while magically helping to maintain the yellowish explosive appearance of the zit itself. I would advise the traveling public to revolt against the French Milled soaps and bring your own, however with airport security the way it is....our government might get confused by a bar of soap and think you're trying to use it to bring down an airliner. On to my next subject!

No Surprise here....the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) is showing just how stupid their leadership is, and how stupid the traveling public is if they believe anything the TSA tells them.

Newsflash.....August 10, 2006: You're Bottle of Dasani is Deadly! You are packing the Killer Colgate! That's right everybody, the government has told us that terrorists tried to sneak bad things onto planes in commercial everyday packaging and therefore, you could be carrying a Blistex Bomb. So, what was learned after 9/11? There are terrorists who are 17-35 year old Muslim extremists and they want to kill Americans. OK, we learned that lesson the hard way back in 2001. As a solution, our Administration sought to prevent these sick A-Holes from boarding planes and doing it again. Mind you, last time around, they didn't even try to blow up airplanes with explosives because even back they, it was not easy for them to sneak explosives onboard. So, they brought FAKE bombs to scare people and used hand tools to kill and overtake airplanes. What did TSA do right back then? The forced airlines to put heavy duty cockpit doors on their planes that can't shot open. At least they did that! Then TSA hired, trained and paid thousands of new screeners for security checkpoints. Random tests at many airports have proven TSA to be mildly better than the old system. Hey, it's improvement, we'll take it. 5 years later, TSA is still looking for box cutters, shoe bombs and now liquid explosives. What they should've done to ease the checkpoint congestion, reduce operating costs and relieve a HUGE percentage of the traveling public from excess screening would be both profiling and a registered traveler program. Why didn't they do this yet, well...Profiling might offend someone and a registered traveler program might be invasive to someone's privacy. Great, so instead, the traveling public has to endure even more frustration, TSA will spend more to accomplish this new frustrating and incredibly useless screening and still...the truth is....you are not any safer than you were on August 9th.

To top that, now employees are no longer allowed to carry a beverage with them to work, nor can they have a bottle of water with them while they load an airplane with hundreds of heavy bags in the middle of the summer's heat. Why, because TSA doesn't think before they put rules into action. Airline/Airport employees go through a lot of vetting before they are even allowed to work at the airport. Maybe this will scare you....these employees (if they didn't go bad) probably wouldn't use water or Cocoa Butter to cause damage....why use something like that when they have an incredible amount of Hazardous Materials at their disposal. Fuel, Oil, batteries, etc...

What makes the traveling public as ignorant as TSA? They believe that TSA is creating a safer environment with all of these restrictions. The fact is, a terrorist is the danger, not the bottles, makeup, lotions or toothpastes that people carry with them. TSA can restrict everything right down to "No Carry On baggage" and still, terrorists themselves will find new ways to try and cause harm. TSA needs to re-think the way they operate. The problem is with people, not products. The Government does know this, but are afraid of profiling as it might offend people. They don't tell this to the public because they need the public to believe that limiting carry on baggage from people will make them safer. Here we are 5 years after 9/11 and terrorists are still trying to take down airliners. How many more attempts or how much longer will the public have to wait for our government to start offending people and finally focusing on the source of the problem?

What's next....? Terrorists will use methane gas to try and blow up planes. TSA response: All passengers must Fart one time at the security checkpoint and then again prior to boarding to ensure no possible explosions in flight from terrorists who might try and light farts. By the way, when that happens, tree sticks will no longer be allowed because the terrorists will have tried to create fart explosion by rubbing two sticks together near their assholes. That is the new definition of a "Dirty Bomb."